Highway to men’s heart

Since last one week, I am on bed, isolated in one room. Neem leaves spread over the bed and I am awaiting for blisters to dry up and back to my health again. I, with two more colleagues got chicken pox at the same time. Not sure if its the temparature humidity controlled AC room and another colleague who have just recovered up or being blessed with the Mata not blessed earlier (Chicken pox is still considered the blessing of Godess in many part of India). Anyway it has to happen!

During the course, the fever, headache and the weakest feeling have changed the taste buds too. Earlier days as the mouth was affected, even a bit of salt or slightest spicy food was intolerable. I was given boiled food with little salt and turmeric. I used to have the changed menu even in those days. Though I must admit, the boiled food has been tasty really. Dear used to have the same food, prepared for me. Not sure, how! Note worthy here is we both love spicy food!!

Today’s lunch was again simple and again same dull looking because of the little oil and microscopic masala but it was plateful rice, dal with lauki, bottlegourd bhaji, aloo gobhi sabji. After the weakness in this recovery period, I had finished them in a shot and asked for a second little serving!!

May be its again one of the tastiest food, I had from her. May be spices that contribute to the taste, but its something else than spices that makes food so tasty! Love you dear !!

I used to have little argument with her on the old saying that, the way to men’s heart is not only through stomach but other things too. But I guess there exists ‘a way’, and infact there must be a national highway in construction !!

How Many Roties Your Guest Eat!!

Case A: “How many Roties you eat !!”  – The host asked the Guest before going to prepare dinner for him.

Case B: During dinner, host has served 2 roties and curry to the guest, a grown up person.  After some time, curry is there in Guest’s plate but roties has finished. Host comes with a single roti in a plate and asks the guest, “Do you want more!”  Guest hesitantly says – “okey one”.  After few mins – host asks from the kitchen ” Do you want more roties!”  Guest says – “No its okey”.

Having been in such places – wish I could put the plate down and move out.  But bonded with some social terms – had to gulp food unwillingly.

I guess  – these particular hosts behaviors, they don’t do knowingly, but they inherit it. Playing host is an art as well a religion – that’s mostly inherited. At least in Indian context – host must GUESS out (or ask politely, if the need arises) the food interests based on the time of day, the distance the guest has come or anything that gives a clue. His hesitation must be respected instead of exploring his belly volume or level of hunger.

In former “Case:A” a person will not eat 50 roties – so preparing a few more roties than a normal person eats, is not going to affect the hosts kitchen budget significantly. In later “Case: B” extending the hand with few rotis over guest plate will give a clue- if the guest wants to have more.

Preparing food for any one is preparing “Prasadam”. If you believe that it will satisfy the a human’s first basic need. And if this belief is right – the right attitude will come. And if you have the right attitude the prepared food will look great – aroma will make guest more hungry – and of course the taste will be great.

I will put two more cases of Host’s attitude that I saw again closely:

Case C:A guest arrived at somebody’s home. Around 15 mins of talk is over. The guest is now about to leave. At the time guest gets up the chair , the host asks ‘Should I prepare some tea for you’. Guest replies – “No thanks its okey”.

Case D:A North Indian host arranged party for the friends, which comprised mostly of south Indians. But the host arranged the venue where north Indian food is served. Its not because the south Indians wanted to have the north Indian food, but the North Indian Host does not like south Indian food !!

To “Serve” a food to guest – one must behave like “Servant”.

Waiting…

Waiting for the moments,
Touching the flowers,
Petals – pink and soft.
Breeze of breaths across.

In-
His garden green.


Waiting to hear the twitters,
Over the tree branches,
Little bird swinging them.
And playing with leaves.


In –
His Reality or Dream.

Waiting for the scent,
Of the blossoms,
Each morning fresh.
As the thousand roses around.

In – His Oasis in the way long.

————————————-
Picture Courtesy: http://artfiles.art.com

Photo of Lily..

Casting: That evening, little did the smart ladies, knew that in the shopping mall, their voice was loud enough to reach the audience. And the audience knew their dialect very well.
————————————
First Lady:

“You know – hearing the words of mother – he immediately jumped off Sofa . And when her mother said – “Beta, it have been long time that I have seen the photo of Lily – Can you send me one photo of you and Lily?”
“Where as he does not moves out of Sofa for three days !” – She added.
“Nipun got up the sofa and dressed up and went to the photo lab. Within two hours he was back with washed photos. I was surprised. Next day while leaving for office, he sent the photos to Yadavpur (Kolkata) by Courier. He did not washed the photos of our honeymoon even after long time and even when I said. And after hearing the Mothers word’s he jumped from Sofa……. How much Nipun Changed in three years of knowing me in Bangalore! Before how much he used to just love me. Everything changed now. How do I feel..
….
….
You know that old lady when fells sicks – its seems that she is almost going to die. Every time she fells sick – it seems that  this time she will die…
….
….

Second Lady:


….
Oh that party.. All had nice Maal (drink) …
….
You know na what Kushal did -She did not wanted to take me for the outings..To save money. But when his father came – He took him to Pondicherry tour. Would you believe…
….
….
You know what they think… I am brainwashing you…
….
….
And my mother-in-law… Pathetic…. I will not be silent unless I get her the air of prison. You know what …. one case of Domestic violence, if I put – they will be behind bars. Just only what need to be done is give a statement of domestic violence and first thing police will do is arrest the entire family.

….

First lady is paying her bill by Meal Pass.
First Lady: Would’t you buy anything?
Second Lady: No.. I just came to have some Puchkas ( Pani Puris)……
————————————
Audience was shocked to see one another world of-in-Laws-inside-out.

Beyond pink lips

March 6th. That evening Abhilash was returning from office normally walking down the market.

And again he gave a look towards the Dentist’s clinic. And since last days he was feeling a sensation in one of tooth, he thought to go inside and get it checked. He waited outside doctor’s chamber. There was no other patient that time. From the seat he sat, he was able to see a fair lady sitting in plain sky color salwar suit – talking with some person.

“A Nurse – she may be.. “, he thought .

After the patient came out, the so the seemingly nurse followed. Abhilash asked her , “Is Doctor inside ?”.

“Yes please come in.” She said and Abhilash followed her.

She sat on the doctor’s chair. Abhilash was surprised to see the simplicity of the doctor. To whom he thought as a nurse.

Round face, encapsulating perfectly pink lips, fair color. hairs well tied behind, height may be around 5′ 2″. Hard to believe her as a doctor – still looked liked some medical college passout – straight from the class. Her age can be hardly 25, he guessed.

“Name ?” She asked with cool voice.

“Abhilash Trivedi.”

“Age?”

“29. Next month, I will be 30.”- he smiled.

At first she wrote 29 and did overwriting and made it 30. She too smiled, keeping her head still low.

She asked about his problem.

“Take out your tongue” she said politely. He was surprised on it otherwise all the grey haired doctors say with a command.”TAKE OUT YOUR TONGUE”

She asked about his dental history and at the same time she was writing on the prescription. Abhilash was looking at her thin fingers holding the pen. Hundreds of girl he might have seen. And she was different altogether, even in her simplicity. And his sixth sense was not wrong, he was sure.

She made an instant impression on his mind. He had a look on her forehead – any vermillion marks? No. Mangal sutra – No. Okey, may be she is married – as being a south Indian its difficult to mark it out sometimes. But he without any clue, after seeing her innocent face and her peaceful smile – Abhilash can guarantee that she was unmarried.

“Why don’t you get your teeth’s scaling done, it has accumulated tartar ” , she suggested after writing the medicines and mouth wash name.

“How much it will cost ?” He asked back, as it was another chance to come back and see that innocent smile.

“800 (Rs). for two or three sessions” , she said.

“Is 800 (Rs.) for each session?” Abhilash wanted to confirm. Even though he was ready for 800 Rs. per session just to meet her.

“Nah ! ” She smiled, ” Don’t worry ! 800 for all two or three session. After one session it can be said how many more sessions you may need. ”

“When can I came?” he asked hiding his impatience.

“You have to get a prior appointment” “Where do you stay ? ” she asked.

“Behind Natraj Building, Nirvana Apartments” He said. Natraj building was at walkable distance from there.

“Then you can come in evening too. Is not it ? Is evening time fine for you ?” She said and took out her diary. “Is this Friday ok for you, 6:30 pm”

“How long one session takes ?” he asked as if he didn’t want long sessions !

“Approx. half an hour.”

“Then okay, Friday is fine for me, I will come straight from office. I will confirm you before I come. May I have your number?”

‘Its written on prescription, my personal cell no. Yeah you may give me a call.”

The smile, glowing face, simplicity and the small touch on his cheek during the check up was different. Night spent sleepless. On the prescription, he read her name Vandana Rao. Yeah she was a south Indian, “unmarried” – thinking he smiled. Sleeping on bed, in the darkness, his face was glowing when he was saving her number in his mobile.
He put a cute girl icon with her name.

Tuesday….. Thursday……. and Friday came. In office, he was feeling the air around fragrant as it seemed his first love. He was happy and everyone can read that. Lunch
was over and he put alarm in his mobile at 5.00. He will leave early from office – not in the office cab. He will hire an auto and go to Vandana’s clinic. He had to leave, the office by 5:15 at any cost.

He reached there by 6:10. But the seat from where he can see the doctor was occupied by a fat lady, holding her swollen cheek. The talks inside was coming out. He wanted her to see. She seemed to be busy with other patient and the scaling machine seemed to be running. It was 6:45 now.

Suddenly she came out. She smiled, pulling her face mask down. Today in doctor’s apron she was looking like a doctor, not a girl.

Though she seemed tired but still the face was radiating energy.

Seeing Abhilash sitting, she smiled and said “Wait please, just one more patient then I will call you.”

“No problem, I will wait” – He smiled with a great satisfaction.

The fat woman went inside and her equally fat husband accompanied her. After 5 mins, the couple came out and Doctor called “Abhilash.”

“Take out specs and lie down there”

She prepared the next set of instruments and made the dental chair flat. She started scaling with small needles type instruments. At first it was painful for Abhilash. He was uncomfortable.

Her two palms were occasionally resting on his clean shaven cheeks. “Did you ever get your teeth’s scaling done?” and like this she was talking and simultaneously moving swiftly her fingers inside mouth.

In the process, his mouth became full of medicated water and saliva.

“Spit it out and rinse mouth with water”

He did so.

The tingling sensation of scaling machine seemed to be unbearable. The doctor was standing and carefully doing the scaling, He understood that even a small miss of doctor will make a wound in tongue or cheek.

He felt on his head something soft touched. The tingling sensation flowed from teeth to head. She was careful for him, but careless for herself. Her body was touching his head. Now he could feel it clearly.

Scaling was going on. He was said to spit it out again. Again the process started. She stood close to him. He thought – may psychologically doctor wants to keep the pain out with her touch.

“Stupid thoughts for a doctor”- he scolded himself. But after a while there was no pain while scaling was being done.

“Is its paining now” she asked.

“Very little” and true he was. It was a motherly touch, he guessed. But there was a different kind of feeling for the lady – he was sure.

Half an hour passed off. Not a single time he pondered to think, what’s program is going on the TV kept in front.

He was said to come after 15 days. May be two more session required.

After 15 days, he called him before coming to clinic. She said – not to come – as she had some personal urgent work.

Personal work – what can be ! “May be… May be ….”

Anyway he was happy that next day she called him in morning being holiday for him

Next morning he took a fast breakfast and was ready to lie down on dental chair for the scaling by 11 in the morning.

There was no patient in the clinic at the time. And as he reached there, he found, she was waiting for him.

“Come Abhilash, how are you feeling now.” “Did you brush twice as I said?” she asked treating him like a kid.

He like it! Her smile was contagious.

Suddenly a tall good looking person in formal dress came inside and went outside without saying anything. May be some patient in waiting..

That day she seemed to be relaxed and gave more attention to him. He had absoultely no pain that day. As she was really smooth in her scaling process.

She suggested for one tooth filling done afterwards. Scaling seemed near to completion,

“Abhilash, I think you need not do the third session. I have cleaned all the tarter. Your enamel is thin. Third session may affect that.”

Abhilash thought there would be three sessions, and he would get more chance to talk with her. As she too asked about him, his family his job etc.

Abhilash was now in a mess ! He had hoped for a third session. He wanted to come more frequently there. To make the situation worst, he had paid only Rs 300 in first session. And he realized he had left in purse in home and there may be maximum of Rs. 200 in his jean’s pocket. He was still lying on chair, unable to check his back jean’s pocket with a touch.

She did his tooth polishing. He washed his mouth. There was still soothing feeling in him with her treatment. But now his problem was he did not carry Rs. 500/- with him.

He sat down. Tried to cool him self internally. He gathered his smile and thought to make himself normal. Doctor was in her chair. He put his hand his pocket, took out money. It was not even Rs. 200. There was total 188 Rs. there ! Rs. 12 – he bought the bread packet in morning.

“I have forgetten my purse in home today, I have 150/- now, can I bring the rest money in 20 min.” He said feeling guilt.

“No need to go now for bringing your purse, whatever you have now, you can give. Rest you may give later.” She said calmly.

Abhilash didn’t wanted to leave early after giving her money, as already there will not be 3rd session. He wanted to talk more, if possible. Though a mechanical engineer by profession, he had an inclination towards the medical science, so do for the doctor clearly.

There were medical books on the table. He guessed out she may be preparing for masters degree as she holds a bachelor’s degree only. He thought to start a talk on the title of the book kept on table – “Autism”

“Are you preparing for M.S. or M.D.? ” he asked

“No why ?” she smiled.

“Nah I thought so,” He continued “But this book is related to mental health. And you are dentist. Do you have some interest in mental health.”

“I am reading for myself .”

“Yourself !”

“Yeah myself, this book I have brought from US. This is good book.”

“But have you any specific interest in mental health studies?”

“I read it for my two year’s old son.”

Darkness surrounded him. She was married and have a son too, who was born like that. It happens 1 in 250 children. He became bloodless. Hands cold. How this lady keeps her smile intact always, looking so innocent.

Abhilash knew very well – “What is Autism ?”

He was looking at her. She was telling about herself. From day one to him, she was like a friend. Yeah like a friend – as some persons spread the aura of friendly attitude for everyone. She was telling him about her son more. There was a soothing touch in her voice, a pain hidden inside.

Suddenly she realized something and said ,” Abhilash, my husband is waiting outside. I have to leave now.”

“How she knew her husband had come. No phone call ! ” Abhilash thought,” Oh the tall man who came inside was his husband for sure. A gentleman indeed. ” Abhilash wished for her son’s well being and praised the lady’s courage. He came out assuring her to meet again with the rest money.

That night too Abhilash was lying on bed, but he was relaxed recalling her face.

Her smiling ever face was revolving in his eyes, and her words were reverberating in his ears – ” I was a doctor, but never thought my child will have autism. Though my husband was knowing of the child’s symptoms, but till one year he did not told me anything. He thought I will feel pain, if I knew. But now I am prepared for taking care of his future. He seems to be improving with my care…. May God have found me strong enough that I can do this duty perfectly…. ”

“May God have found me strong enough that I can do…….”

In the soothing vibrations, slept Abhilash with a selfless feeling, recalling the young lady’s smile – that was divine – beyond pink lips.

Bride

She –

Sitting on a chair.
Silent – willing to talk a lot.
But she couldn’t.

Composed posture –
She can’t move much.

Silent – willing to ask,
But nothing she asked.
Questions buried in destiny.

Silent – willing to laugh,
But she can’t do.

Ah ! She is a bride –
For tomorrow – Of – Some man !

A perfect man !

Like ever before –
Again today morning,
I wake up –
To walk again,
On the road.

Whole day,
I tried hard,
To make it new,
To write a lesson new,
As I prayed.
Throwing my bad veil,
Cleaning what ever inside.

I try hard,
To throw some smile,
To wipe some tears,
To share the weight.

All the struggle,
Continues till the dusk,
Trying hard to know unknown,
Working hard to make a place,
Some where a bit to stand.
Pretending to be –
A perfect Man !

In the struggle,
Like some warrior,
I get tired bad,
Enough tired –
To just fell on –
The bed.

But eyes open,
Till late night –
Open eyes – I do sleep.
Like a worrier,
Who lost the battle.

May a morning –
Comes once again.
And I try again,
To be a –
A perfect man !

Temple(s) of we mentally retarded people

I have been to ISKCON many a times but to a NGO it was my first visit in Bangalore.

On the 80 feet road, there on a wall written – Asha Niketan. It is a NGO – where SDIPA students decided to make friendship with.

Asha Niketan – a simple building with brown brick walls. With the packet of cloths and other things given by M.S., I entered the gate. And the wavy stairs reached the verandah. There on the bench sitting were some persons.One can see their bent heads, hanging hands, drooling tongue and the dull looking persons – we call them mentally retarded – who don’t have a home like ours !

After entering there, suddenly a feeling came to me. And the feeling I did compared my entry to another famous place – the ISKCON. But both feelings did had a contrasting experience !

When I go to ISKCON – there I try to be good devotee for the minutes/hours – I spend there. There I don’t find the priest’s eyes welcoming me. They seem to be immersed in a another world, in the greatness of the great temple. Of course the security guards, do welcome me as I am a patron member there ! I do get special entry with a life time pass. But even at the temple, truly I don’t feel on the ground in that way I did felt there.

At Asha Niketan, within the dull looking boundaries – everyone is welcome equally. I was said to wait for sometime – as some authority was to come to collect the things. Soon a tall white lady came and took me to a small room. An inadequately lighted house with a PC on the table. In the room, there were other donated things kept in a big bag. She was so busy that she did not opened the things donated earlier. Down the corner, in another room, I can see elderly people sitting down for meals.

And my eyes were feasting on the walls. The walls had paintings – must be made by the members of Asha Niketan. The painted human figures were not as beautiful as I did saw the Bal-Gopal’s paintings on the walls of temple. But these dull colors in painting were speaking aloud. They do make candles, cards and do sell them. ISKCON too make agarbattis, sweets and so many others things and help many needy persons.

Both are temples to serve the human kind. And the fact is, at the NGO’s, we don’t expect the blessing deity idol there, so most of us don’t go inside the NGO’s making a big queue. And of course in temple, most of us do like to go in queue or become life patron ( for shortcut entry or special treatment or big donation) for the essence of some assurance of heaven out of hell life or for fulfillment of some wish. Anyway in front of deity, we do chant and dance too.

Here they learn dance for therapy, dance for happiness and dance for friendship. SDIPA instructors do train the mentally retarded people free of cost, and make them dance on stage. Imagine the different level of grasping power of mentally retarded people. On the stage, all persons trying to follow the steps of instructor lately and one person just moving the hanging hands sidewards throughout the dance.

The dance of life.. in the different coloured beams focussed on us on the world’s stage. Yeah we all the dancers , tied with HIS strings.

We dance, act, sing on the stage of world. And there are some persons, who play the relationship acts beyond blood relations and they run the NGOs.

The deepest need of each one is to love and to be loved.” – the leaflet of Asha Niketan says.

Have Feet – Will Dance

Have Feet – Will Dance ™ – The motto of SDIPA.

For the uninitiated – SDIPA stands for Shiamak Davar’s Institute for the Performing Arts.

I saw the poster of SDIPA classes in Jayanagar 4th block last year itself, but somehow the I was late to call the enrollment office, but this time I did not missed it and got the seat.

Learning dance was needed from childhood itself. It was a forceful push by Ma, to a dancing group in the durga-puja became a obsession later. Yeah, I do love to dance  on my feet to my own tunes, when ever I do get a chance.  But I needed a professional touch and discipline to it.  And in the month of January I joined it at SDIPA in Winter funk to learn Jazz. 

After training of 12 classes, our adult’s beginner’s group made the final presentation at St. John’s Auditorium on the rocking song of Jab We Met – Mauza hi Mauza. And the synchronized entry and exit towards audience (to make them dance) was really good. The song required a lot of energy and hopefully the group did its best. The quite good ( pretty too :p )  instructor made the tough steps easy and learning dance was really a fun for the beginners like us.  Her smile made the whole batch learn smile a lot.  

About 1,500 students were present in the presentation day from all Bangalore centers !  Not caring for food or time, many of them seemed practicing slowly in small groups, still before the presentation! What makes such a large number of people dance ?  One may be surprised to know the student’s age group. Its ranges from 4 to 60+.

Shiamak must had some very clear dreams and willingness to live a life , that he thought to share, through the performing art forms – dance . 

Thanks to Shiamak, whose heart speaks –

“I am an eagle that soars over southern seas,
I am a reason for people, who want to believe,
‘I am’, ‘I am not’, ‘I should be’, ‘I could be’,
In a world of ‘I’, I’m a person with just one belief:
Love my priceless possession
& God my savior in need.”

Hope to join the next level batches in summer funk.

The Handbag

Her marriage is on 16th Dec. Her marriage invitation card along with a letter reminded me the day, which was her second day in the office.

To me, it was a normal working day, as I reached the door of first floor and I was about to enter. On the right side, I saw the new girl stepping down the stairs from the cafeteria. But to me it seemed that her steps were extra cautious.

My sub-conscience was not wrong. Just before, she was about to touch the floor from the stairs, she got unbalanced and was about to fall miserable. Without thinking anything, I moved forward and hold her hand. Before I can extend my left hand, she balanced herself . Before she could understand what happened, she promptly said… “Oh Sorry”.

I observed , her eyelid seemed wet. She might have cried few minutes before in cafeteria, I guessed.

While falling , she managed her dupatta but could not balance her handbag. The handbag kept rolling on the stairs towards ground floor. I guessed she did not fastened the zip of the handbag. The things in handbag scattered !

I offered her help. We gathered many used mobile recharge coupons (which she seemed never throw), a lipstick, a small diary, one small black polythene, petals of a dry rose which had turned out black, and a half torn letter, and some piece of paper torn in smallest pieces. There were broken bangle pieces ( Not sure, were they broken before ) and a little soft-toy attached key-chain.

At the time there were no one on the stairs to make her more embarrassed , but she was embarrassed. She must had got sprains on the ankle. Afterwards, neither I nor she said this falling episode to our colleagues ever.

She stayed with us for 7 months. The days she spent with our teams were really good. She changed the organization for better prospects. The industry is habituated to see such departures , but to two of her friends, it meant missing her contribution in the team.

I never knew much about her, unless few days before, she sent me a friend request in Orkut. I clicked to her personal profile. I was surprised to see her details. She had written: from the past relationship I learnt — “NEVER EVER trust Anybody”. I was a bit surprised to know this thing about her, but the sentence did elaborate the things she kept in her handbag.

I accepted her friend request and wrote a mail for her auspicious future.

She replied me back.

Aakash,
……….
Today I dont have words to reply your line
“I do wish, Bhanumati ka Pitara ( the handbag) will contain fresh roses now onwards”
…..
Apply for leave early and try to come along with Rakesh.
……
……
Regards,
C. Puja