Case A: “How many Roties you eat !!” – The host asked the Guest before going to prepare dinner for him.
Case B: During dinner, host has served 2 roties and curry to the guest, a grown up person. After some time, curry is there in Guest’s plate but roties has finished. Host comes with a single roti in a plate and asks the guest, “Do you want more!” Guest hesitantly says – “okey one”. After few mins – host asks from the kitchen ” Do you want more roties!” Guest says – “No its okey”.
Having been in such places – wish I could put the plate down and move out. But bonded with some social terms – had to gulp food unwillingly.
I guess – these particular hosts behaviors, they don’t do knowingly, but they inherit it. Playing host is an art as well a religion – that’s mostly inherited. At least in Indian context – host must GUESS out (or ask politely, if the need arises) the food interests based on the time of day, the distance the guest has come or anything that gives a clue. His hesitation must be respected instead of exploring his belly volume or level of hunger.
In former “Case:A” a person will not eat 50 roties – so preparing a few more roties than a normal person eats, is not going to affect the hosts kitchen budget significantly. In later “Case: B” extending the hand with few rotis over guest plate will give a clue- if the guest wants to have more.
Preparing food for any one is preparing “Prasadam”. If you believe that it will satisfy the a human’s first basic need. And if this belief is right – the right attitude will come. And if you have the right attitude the prepared food will look great – aroma will make guest more hungry – and of course the taste will be great.
I will put two more cases of Host’s attitude that I saw again closely:
Case C:A guest arrived at somebody’s home. Around 15 mins of talk is over. The guest is now about to leave. At the time guest gets up the chair , the host asks ‘Should I prepare some tea for you’. Guest replies – “No thanks its okey”.
Case D:A North Indian host arranged party for the friends, which comprised mostly of south Indians. But the host arranged the venue where north Indian food is served. Its not because the south Indians wanted to have the north Indian food, but the North Indian Host does not like south Indian food !!
To “Serve” a food to guest – one must behave like “Servant”.